Why Dutch espresso is so crap

I don't expect every country in the world to have a food culture. And in "food culture" I stress "food" (as in: stuff that comes on a plate, not on a slice of bread - with the notable exception of bruschetta, which is delicious) and "culture" (as in: appreciating the subtle nuances in flavors instead of stuffing yourself with something as cheap as possible, preferably on bread).

I don't even expect every country in the world to make a good espresso (even the French suck at that).
But when you find out that Dutch espresso is usually so crap not because of a lack of espresso culture but because bars want to save money and are ready to do anything to save a few cents here and there (and I will reveal the shocking meaning of "anything" in the next paragraph - you've been warned), then it gets sickening.
First let's clarify the difference between Dutch espresso and Espresso.
A Dutch espresso usually fills the cup. That's because the Dutch feel they get ripped off if only half of the cup is filled (they paid for the whole cup, right?). That usually waters down the flavor of the already tasteless espresso even more and makes the coffee very watery instead of the dense coffee bean nectar it should be.
A Dutch espresso usually has a very pale, beige crema that disappears as soon as you dip your little spoon in the coffee, instead of the thick dark crema that it should have.
A Dutch espresso is boiling hot and burns your tongue.
A Dutch espresso tastes like old, burned, sour coffee.
Oh, and by the way, a Dutch espresso is usually twice as expensive as a good espresso in Milan.

That said, let's see why.
There are two reasons, and they all have to do with money (surprised?).
First reason is that to save money, your typical Dutch baristas grind their beans very coarse, so they're able to use less coffee to fill the filter. This usually makes the water flow through the filter as if you were flushing a toilet and the taste goes down the toilet too.
Second reason is quite shocking. I got this information from a bar owner in Amsterdam and I find it quite easy to believe.
Apparently it's a common practice in some Dutch bars and restaurants (don't know how common) to RECYCLE the burnt coffee residue of their machine (basically what's left in the filter after you made the coffee). So to save money, what they do instead of throwing it away is keep it, let it dry, mix it with "new" coffee and use it again. Hmmmm. yummy.
Soylent Green

Comments

[Breigh]

THANK YOU!
I haven't read a thing on your site yet past the "even the service is below sea level" line. I had to go straight to my blog and post that line and a link to your blog because it was one of the funniest things I've heard in a while.

Looking forward to reading more of your site... good to know there are others out there sharing my pain!

[Mudpuppy]

I thought the coffee was Okay when I first moved here 7 years ago, but then I took a trip to Italy, and well, I think I've enjoyed maybe three cups of espresso in Amsterdam in the past 6 years. I make it at home, but when I go out I drink beer.

Now, try ordering a good beer in Italy. Bwahaaa haaa haa.

Face it, Holland is for beer and wiet.

Italy is for coffee.

[michel]

i think you got a very bad experince here in holland. i,am the dutch latte-art champion and not at al place the make bad espresso. i dare you to come to Enkhuizen and i will show you that whe have also a perfect espresso here in the netherlands.

[mark]

ì kinda agree with you only there are a lot of places where you can get a decent shot, and the twice using of the grounds seems almost like a fairytale, its just not possible to make that work maybe some really big idiots do that but i doubt many do.

still most dutch espresso's are simple short lungo's and thats crappy.
try going to michel's place they really do serve great shots as do a lot more places(too few)